For Tia


Summer clouds are drifting by;
a slight breeze moves along the still air.
I sit by a wizened oak,
with dandelion dust in my hair.
A mother robin hops nearby
in search of a tasty worm.
She finds her prey and plucks it up
with a gentleness no less firm.
I want to think of tea parties
and princesses smiling bright,
of hyacinths and other flowers,
of balloons adrift - just out of sight.
But my cavernous mind is empty now.
I have no strength to think.
I'm frightened of what else can be lost
if I take the time to blink.
I'm just a woman, not a god.
I have no claim to fame.
I have no control of Earthly Life
And in this I find no shame.
But I wish that Life would sometimes ask
me what I think or feel
And not take such drastic steps
to make Pain a touch so real.
I have known Love, I know it now
and I'm thankful for its presence.
But always, with Love, comes the ache
of knowing that Its essence
can be lost with Time, with thoughtlessness,
with agony and sorrow.
I know today that I have Love
but It may be gone tomorrow.
But please don't think that life is pain;
that there is no beauty to be found.
Because in Love there is also light,
a brightness all around.
Sometimes the darkness makes great shadows
and the light seems awfully dim.
But I'll see a Beauty and hear a Sound
that create an Earthly Hymn.
The darkness clears and again there's light,
though the shadows may just hide.
But they've recessed enough to let me out
with a knowledge that I've defied
Death's wish to close me in,
to lock away my soul,
to leave an empty casing -
I know that is its goal.
But I am free and so are you
and so are those we've lost
to feel the beauty of Love again
though our hearts are constantly tossed
within this realm of good and evil,
of extreme pleasure and cruel pain.
But we have so much less to lose
than we really have to gain.
I tell my Mind that this is Truth
but it must listen to my Heart
Though it also must often take control
so my soul won't fall apart.
So, take me Life, where you will
but still allow me to be free
to think and feel and express myself -
Allow me to be Me.
But please show patience; please show mercy;
Please keep the pain at bay.
This ship called Me just needs a rest
from feeling tossed today.
My Mind now has wakened; thoughts rush in,
and the massive void is filled.
My Mind has convinced my Heart to open
(at this it's very skilled).
I can see the children, drinking tea -
there are mirrors all around;
there are ladybugs and butterflies;
make-up kits scattered on the ground.
She's there right now, having fun -
a mirror in her hand.
She glances up at her arriving friends -
Her wings encompass the distant land.
She wears a crown.  It's glowing bright.
Her smile warms the seasonless sky.
"Tia is here," the Angels whisper
as they flit about on high.
She takes a cup, and it is pink -
the prettiest one on the table.
She makes a toast to a talking fawn
right out of a timeless fable.
She twirls about and sings a song,
rubies glitter on her dancing shoes.
More Angels gather at her party
as they hear the joyful news.
A pretty, wide-eyed Angel glides to her
with wings of a butterfly.
She greets dear Tia with warm hugs
and seeing a tear, reminds her not to cry.
"Your Mom and Dad - and siblings, too -
will always know you're near
And here, in Heaven, you won't know pain -
or suffering or fear."
Tia brightens and glances down
to where her family remains
and sends warm breezes and sunny skies
and a light blanket of soothing rains.
"Why the rain?" the Angel asks.
(Mia is her Earthly name)
"I want to cool their bodies -
their pain burns like a flame."
Mia nods.  She knows too well
about the suffering one's loss can cause -
It ravishes one's soul like a thirsty fire,
one that never takes a pause.
Tia once more looks up
into the eyes of her new Angel friend.
"I'll be with them forever, Mia.
My love will never end."
Mia nods and takes her hand
and leads her to the Angels in the park.
"We want to continue with our party
before it gets too dark."
"There's Night here?" Tia asks,
"I thought Heaven was the Sun."
"Night is our reminder, Tia,
that our lives are not undone.
The Moon is our Hope and Thankfulness;
the Stars are our Laughter and Joy;
the Owls are our Wisdom;
the Fireflies we just enjoy!"
Tia smiles.  She understands.
Within her Life still glows.
She can love and laugh and draw and sing -
She can even wiggle her toes.
"Let's go now, Mia," Tia laughs,
"though there's lots of tea to spare!"
"And I'll take daisies, " Mia says,
"and weave them in your hair!"
The Moon begins its long ascent
into the Heaven Sky
but True Darkness never claims these lands.
Brightness is close by.
Into the sky Tia flies,
her wings opaque but strong -
And gleefully she joins her friends
in their joyous Angel Song...


Kim McAdams